Are you an Entrepreneur, Developer, Technologist, or Someone who spend more time with your computer compared to your friends or family?
Well, I am one! I have been working on my a** since from last 12 years in IT industry. Not that I am complaining about it. I live a decent life. But I feel like I am missing something. The pain of not meeting new people or making new acquaintance to progress in my personal life.
And I feel it…
I had a beautiful girlfriend in my university. We had fun, but after we finished our course, she moved to a different city, and now she is with someone else.
I have also date multiple people. But what I realised is everyone I dated in last 10 years are from these so called online dating apps.
I met only one girl through my common friends, whom I dated for a while. But other than her.
Everyone else is from either Tinder, Bumble or Hinge.
Is that the same case with you too?
If it is, then we have to come together and create a huge army around the world who promote natural acquaintances rather than these digital, fake, manupulated money sucking platforms.
So I started thinking the other day and decided to put a list where I can go and meet people without using any dating app.
So here is the list I figured:
1. Gym
If you go to gym and workout yourself, you are never going to meet anyone.
Trust me, I know how it works.
- You see a cute girl or boy.
- You want to talk, but have no courage to go and speak.
- Not only that, but you try to work out close to them to break the ice. But nothing happens.
- You give up.
But I have come up with a formula which might help you.
Actually, it’s a hack 😉
Usually when you join a gym.
They have these free classes which you could attend every week.
For example:
- Cross fit
- Cardio
- Cycling etc.
Join one of these classes and be regular on them.
Not just you will get into shape, but also you will get to see some people around you in the class. This is quite good for people shy like me.
Because after a while you will be familiar with the surrounding faces.
And that boosts your confidence to talk and break the ice.
2. Social events with your family and friends
Whenever I get invited by my family for a celebration, I typically ignore it. Thinking it will be all boring and same activities.
Well, I am wrong, and can definitely tell you these meetings are wonderful.
Because what, you could always ask your friends or family to bring in new people to these celebrations.
I understand this is not always possible.
But Hey…
You are not loosing anything to try.
3. Meetups in your city
The other place I found very helpful to meet new people is, local events in my city.
I usually go to meetup or bylde to search for local events happening close to where I live.
And surprisingly, here in London, I always find something to do.
The other day it was a Diwali celebration at Trafalgar Square.
Before that, I went to a Brazilian salsa Bar at Leicester Square.
I am not sure which city you live in or if you have an active community around you.
But I am sure if you are willing to travel a bit you will be able to find some cool events.
Again, please don’t just go there and attend the event. Talk to people, make new acquaintances.
4. Workplace
Now, this is a tricky one.
I don’t often suggest dating someone who works with you.
But if you are a consultant or freelancer. And you are working with a client. There might be a good possibility that you meet someone who work in your same industry and share the same values as you do.
It’s easy to meet new people at your new workplace. But I know how hard it is to ask someone out.
Because you always have this second thought in your mind which say:
Hey don’t do that, what if she feels offended or say no.
And, that’s where your conscience tells you.
PLEASE STOP
Well, I have come up with a hack here too.
If you like someone, you can always ask about that person with your common friends.
This gives you a fair amount of idea if this person is single and looking for a relationship.
And if the common friend is generous enough, then you can ask them to invite you both for an after work or weekend get together.
And trust me this is the best way to approach it compared to asking directly.
5. The Classic Bar
Now you must be thinking why the hell on earth I will go to find someone decent.
Well, you are wrong.
First, ladies and gents who come to the bar are not bad!
It’s a miss conception.
You can still go to a bar and see if you find someone interesting there. Politely start a conversation and see how it goes.
There is nothing wrong with it.
Yes, you might sometimes find that you got connected with someone who is in the “quote” different kind of business.
But that could happen anywhere.
Again, the problem is not the bar, it’s your ability to initiate the conversation.
So next time if you are in a bar, think it is like an opportunity to not to log into another dating app.
And this might motivate you to speak with someone who could be a great company.
Let me know which one you are going to try this weekend in comments below.
Chao…
